SWAT The Hell?

Did I ever mention that my office is directly next to the SWAT Team base in Beijing? Well, I did now.

It’s full of blacked out vans and trucks with window protecting cages, floodlights, water cannons: It’s literally an army boy’s wet dream.

They even once (during the power change over) had this van with spikes sticking out of the side, presumably for ramming unruly street food sellers.


“That’ll teach you to skimp on chive!”

Today they had this enormous vehicle the size of a coach, with a beast of a ram at the front and a massive CANNON (yes, you read right, a genuine cannon) mounted on the top.


There was also this all-terrain buggy with huge wheels and a plough on the front (obviously for the more hardy street sellers). It looks like something somebody from the 70’s thought people would drive in 1999, when we all lived on Mars.


All of this makes you think you most definitely should NOT mess with the Chinese SWAT Team.

The officers (soldiers?) are a little different though; you couldn’t meet a friendlier bunch! I once met two of them in the corner store, one of them was asking me all sorts of questions, and now every time I see him he’ll give me a gleeful wave. It cracks me up every time. Imagine the scene: dark and moody SWAT Police marching by in perfect unison, all dressed in black with gleaming boots. All, that is, apart from this one ecstatic grin and frantic wave coming from somewhere in the middle. About as threatening as a quiche Lorraine.

Anyway, I really just wanted to share the pictures of these Stingray-esque SWAT vehicles with you, so, enjoy!


About Greg

A simpleton from West Yorkshire, England living in Beijing. I try to document the oddities, frustrations and funnies that happen to me whilst out here. Hopefully you enjoy reading these little episodes as much as I enjoy writing them.
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